Trask Avenue

Ed. Note: Sifting through the boxes and boxes of artifacts discovered in the attic of Trask Avenue we continue to be surprised. While a lot of the material is admittedly trivial (set of 3 stained Rheingold cardboard coasters; vinyl copy The Archies fourth LP, “Sunshine”; child’s rusted sled from a company named Rose something; 1988 Chris Speier baseball card) occasionally we stumble across something of enduring interest.

The Beatles officially announced their break-up in the spring of 1970. Although many people considered John Lennon the political and social voice of the band, apparently Ringo Starr was the one who wanted to affect real change. He seriously considered running for Prime Minister in the June 1970 election. This despite the fact he was not holding political position within the government and could not “run” for Prime Minister as one might “run” for President of the United States. (Apparently Ringo did not quite grasp the details of how a person became Prime Minister.) He even went so far as to write a speech announcing his candidacy (see below), but it was never delivered. Since he would not return our calls we can only assume someone within his circle stopped him before he could publically declare his intentions.

While we can quibble about Ringo’s understanding of the British political process, it cannot be disputed he was a savvy marketer passionate about the cause.

Hello, mates.

I come before you today not as Ringo Starr Beatles Drummer, but as Richard Starkey Candidate for Prime Minister. You may ask me why a musician would want to enter politics, why I wanna be your man. It’s a fair question. I want to tell you why.

This country needs help. We must get back to a strong, sound and fair England. Like you I’m so tired of all the helter skelter in Parliament. In my life there has been a great cultural shift and still the little piggies run rampant over our people. The taxman takes all our money and then with a shout proclaims, “You never give me your money!” Tell me why we accept such misery! Why do we let it be? We’ve been on the long and winding road of corruption and malfeasance for a long, long, long time and now it must stop.

Now it is time to make a statement.

It is time to smash the glass onion of oppression. It is time for the end of Wilson, Heath and all their kind, and it is time to show them yesterday is gone forever. It is time to end the constant rain of disappointment. If elected I’ll follow the sun until we can truthfully look to the future and say “good day sunshine” every single day!

But I can’t do it alone. I need you.

With your support we can work it out. With your support I’ll be fixing a hole in the sinking ship we call England. With your support I’ll get a ticket to ride right into The House of Commons! And when there I will deliver on my promises and work eight days a week to improve your life.

Let me also assure you that I will not be an invisible leader. You will see me here, there and everywhere. When you approach me I will hold you tight. When you write to me you will never receive no reply. “You won’t see me” are not words in my vocabulary.

I realize times are unpredictable. Tomorrow never knows what will happen and I don’t want to over promise. But from me to you I can promise this: I will carry that weight placed upon me until right prevails over wrong. Why? Because. Because when people come together to make a difference, when people wake from the golden slumbers of indifference, when people feel as if they’re nowhere man, revolution is upon us! And I’ve got a feeling that time is now!

So I stand here today, just a lad from Liverpool who wants to see life getting better for the old brown shoe of the middle class. I can do this with a little help from you, with a little help from my friends. It is time for hello, goodbye. Hello to a progressive England, goodbye to a stodgy England. So all together now join with me and so I can drive my car straight through the walls of the establishment, straight to London where I’ll be working for no one but you!

With your support it won’t be long!

Thanks, mates.