Trask Avenue

The interwebs are such a rich source for comedic gold. You could easily laugh away days thanks to the creativity of others. Of course the difficulty is finding these gems. Often it’s pure luck. You stumble across a video or a written piece which makes the coffee shoot right out of your nose. Well, I’m here today to save you the trouble of wading through the muck. I have found the goldest of gold mines, the deepest vein of precious metals. It doesn’t come from YouTube, The Onion or any of the usual web suspects. It comes from Amazon, that retail behemoth.

Amazon is teeming with keen humorists. You’ll find them lurking in the “Comments” section of products which simply demand attention. Like the one given to us by the fine folks at AutoExec, the “Wheelmate Laptop Steering Wheel Desk.”

“What,” you ask, “is a Wheelmate Laptop Steering Wheel Desk?” Good question! Essentially it’s a semi-sturdy contoured piece of plastic which attaches to your car’s steering wheel so you can use your laptop while sitting in the driver’s seat.

I imagine your initial reaction was similar to mine – one of trepidation. Instinctively I felt the idea of encouraging computer use whilst behind the wheel of a car might be, I dunno, shortsighted. But then I noticed the product has a customer rating of 4 stars (out of 5). Not only that, 607 people took the time to rate it and write a review! 607 is a large number, large enough to make me think the 4 star rating is a fair barometer. Since I’m always on the lookout for unique gifts I dove right into the comments/reviews to get a clearer understanding of this product’s pros and cons. Let me share several. In the interest of fairness I’ll post reviews ranging from the exalted 5 stars down to the dreaded 1 star.

One final note. Amazon allows customers to upload their own images of products. (There are 123 of these.) You’ll see examples interspersed throughout the reviews. A word of advice. Now may be a good time to clear your mouth of any liquids.

5 Stars
Believe it or not, I’m typing this review on my laptop steering wheel desk! As a school bus driver I was never be able to check my email and update facebook while at work. Now I am networking more than ever!

Wow, this really is an incredible time saver! All the things I can get done while driving – a perfect way to use otherwise wasted time! However – there is one concern I have, and it relates to safety. And not just anyone safety, but our childrens safety. I was changing my infant son Mickey the other day, and it occurred to me that if there was an accident, the airbag from the steering wheel could potentially injure the child. Is there any way to turn the drivers airbag off while using the desk as a child changing table? I just don’t think it would be safe otherwise.

It’s perfect for young drivers with heavy academic loads! Now she can work on her homework and still be out driving, improving her road skills and staying on top of her grades. I couldn’t be prouder and would encourage all parents with new drivers to set their kids up with this super-portable work station!

Do you have any idea how hard it is to read Braille books while driving? Every time I’d hit something my book would slide off my lap onto the floor and I’d lose my place. Problem solved…Thanks Laptop Steering Wheel Desk.

I usually prepare a rotisserie chicken for lunch during my drive to work, as I have found the Ronco rotisserie fits perfectly on the passenger seat. Until now, however, I’ve had no place to prepare cole slaw or slice tomatoes for my salad during the trip. This thing is a godsend! I no longer have to waste my morning coffee break chopping cabbage on the men’s room counter!

This is great. I use it to line up shot glasses as I drive my bus of nuns and orphans along the mountain roads from the orphanage to town and back again.

4 Stars
The only reason I don’t give this five stars is because of all the dents it seems to cause on the front of the car. I’m not really sure how the two are related, but I started noticing them a couple days after I got the desk. I bet if they partnered up with the Dent-B-Gone folks and sold a package deal, they’d get a LOT more customers. (They could throw a Sham-Wow in too, to get rid of those pesky red smears for those of us who live near a school zone.)

This product is the perfect size to allow my miniature dachshund to not only look out the window, but also give me those sweet weiner dog kisses while I’m driving! I did a minor retrofit to fix the problem of my dachsie falling off the desk when I make a turn—I glued Velcro strips to the upper surface and put little Velcro booties on Schatzie, so she sticks nicely through the tilts. She loves it!

Well, the only thing I have to add to the reviews on this page is that I was surprised that the operation manual didn’t go into full detail about the fantastic opportunity this device allows for the keen huntsman. I can honestly state that if you’d told me a month ago that I’d be driving down the M40 to London AND shooting birds out of the sky with the accuracy afforded by the AutoExec WM-01 Wheelmate Steering Wheel Desk Tray I’d have laughed in your stupid big face.

3 Stars
I read some 4 and 5 star reviews by those who used this device successfully to change a baby while driving. On that basis, I bought one. I put my baby on it and drove for over an hour. It did not change. Same baby. I am glad it worked for some people but I will be returning mine.

This product really isn’t that great. Yes it does fit very snugly on steering wheel But bead work it’s my passion. Separating beads is a nightmare on this desk because the beads bounce around that might have been because there was no instructions. However the product developers should have taken that into consideration while product testing. I really believe they missed the ball on this item it could have been better.

This is one of those really neat ideas that just needs a bit more tweaking. Mine broke when the airbag deployed and I really think the design should be adjusted a bit to make sure this doesn’t happen. I’ll buy a new one when this has been completed.

2 Stars
I hate this thing. I’ve been using it for a while but the other day I had to make an illegal u-turn and it knocked me out when it slapped me across the face. I just ended up giving it to my sister.

I was really excited about the prospect of not having to get home first to eat dinner. I drove by the Checkers closest to the Burger King which I manage. The drive-through clerk was so nice! I was busy texting my bud about my new steering wheel table, so the clerk just put the food directly onto the table and said “Enjoy!” It was like being at a restaurant, but it wasn’t a restaurant, it was my Mercury Sable! As I was pulling out of the Checkers and onto busy busy Route 15, I was dismayed to learn that the table TURNS WITH THE STEERING WHEEL! What the heck is that? My burger and 40 oz. Fresca spilled all over my lap!

This could have been a great product. The concept is ingenious, and there is no doubt that many drivers have long sought functional workspace while they are driving. I give the product only two stars, however, for its failure to include something so obvious that I can hardly believe it was overlooked: a cupholder. That someone could conceive of something as ingenious as this but overlook including a feature so basic and fundamental as a cupholder is incredible. Perhaps they will introduce a “deluxe” version at some point in the future, but until then I will not spend $24.95 for a steering wheel laptop desk that does not include a cupholder. Ridiculous.

1 Star
Don’t waste your money. Far too small. I thought it would be great for those long nights driving cross county, but by the time I passed through Omaha, my sand mandala was finished.

What a stupid idea. My view to the speedometer is blocked. I can’t even see how fast I’m going.

This product does not make bacon. It does not claim to, but it should. Bacon rules.
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Space constraints (okay, attention spans) tell me it’s wise to stop now. However, there’s plenty more for your enjoyment. Remember kiddies, capitalism is the world’s greatest source of humor!

And you’re welcome.